It's something people don't talk about, but almost everyone does it: masturbation. In one national study, 95 percent of men and 89 percent of women said they had masturbated.
"We are programmed, as best we know, to need orgasms," says Gloria Brame, Ph.D., a clinical sexologist in Athens, Ga. "It's a fundamental aspect of men's health, right up there with brushing your teeth." And the more you know about what satisfies you solo, the more pleasure you get from sex.
You likely know that a little wanking won't make you go blind or cause your penis to fall off. (Let's face it, you'd know by now.) In fact, a little time alone is perfectly healthy for you.
"It relieves stress and keeps everything about your body—your heart rate, blood pressure, reproductive system, brain chemistry—in very good shape," Brame says.
A 2003 Australian study found that men who ejaculated more than five times a week were a third less likely to develop prostate cancer. Regularly flushing your system, so to speak, keeps your semen healthy and prevents the build up of cancer-causing chemicals.
"Men are doing themselves a favor with regular ejaculation," Brame says. "It cleans out the plumbing."
The researchers say sexual intercourse doesn't provide the same benefit because it puts you at risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection.
Masturbation also helps combat premature ejaculation. If you can train yourself to last longer solo, you'll last longer with her.
Her Pleasure = Your Pleasure
Just because your wife or girlfriend owns a Rabbit doesn't means she's not getting enough satisfaction from you. And rest assured, if she knows you're getting busy with your hand (and she either knows or suspects it), she's wondering if she's doing enough to please you.
Having a woman who masturbates is great. First, she's more likely to orgasm during intercourse and oral sex.
And, if she lets you watch, "you can learn a ton about what makes her feel good and what's comfortable for her," says Brian Zamboni, Ph.D., a sex therapist in Minneapolis.
Even better, see if she's up for a duo hand job. Stimulating each other at the same time is intimate, turns her on, and allows both of you to learn more about what the other likes. Which translates to hotter sex.
But sometimes you or she isn't in the mood for sex. Maybe she's pregnant or has gained weight and feels self-conscious about her body. Maybe your libido dropped because of medication or work has you stressed.
"Masturbating together and doing each other will see you through thick and thin," Brame says. "It'll see you into old age. It's something you can always do."
Especially if you don't have time for a long, intimate night, but you're hornier than a preteen watching a well-endowed woman jog. Masturbating each other is a great quickie; and the more you do it, the better you become at learning which buttons to push to make her come faster.
But are your self-pleasure habits normal?
Are You Addicted to Masturbation?
Even if everybody does it, how can you tell if your solo habits are "normal"?
If you think you have a problem, you just may, says Zamboni. If masturbation is interfering with your sleep or work, you should see a therapist.
Masturbation can also interfere with your relationship. "Some people might end up masturbating rather than doing the work it takes to talk with their partner and problem-solve," Zamboni says.
If you're passing up naked time with her for time with a Playmate, find a way to voice your concern—it doesn't have to mean the end of a relationship.
"Start a conversation by saying, 'There's something I want to bring up, but haven't because I'm afraid you'd be mad.' Putting it out there may decrease her negative reaction," Zamboni says. "Or, if it's easier for you, write her a letter."
Another sign of a problem is if you find it difficult to become aroused or maintain an erection when with a woman, but you're fine alone. Sometimes men masturbate so much that they find it hard to climax during intercourse. But, just as you can teach yourself to last longer, you can retrain your wood to react to different levels of friction.
Most likely, though, you don't have a problem. So go ahead and pleasure yourself if she's not around or not in the mood.
But never pass up sex for self-service. Sex with a partner is 400 percent more satisfying than masturbation, according to a European study. Not that you needed a study to know that.
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Article source: http://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/health-and-sexual-benefits-of-masturbation
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