The Truth About Why Some Women Masturbate During Sex

My ex-boyfriend couldn’t keep his hands to himself. I don’t mean that he was a huge fan of PDA — he actually wasn't. I mean he was handsy in bed, in that he would physically prevent me from touching myself.

It was the oddest thing. We’d be having sex, and I’d feel the desire to reach between my legs for a little massage. My ex would spot this, push my hand away, and try to get the job done himself. I hated it. It completely took me out of the moment, and it never resulted in a good orgasm for me.

My ex wasn’t the only one who suffered from handsiness. A few of my former sexual partners have acted like they were emotionally wounded by the fact that my hand was on my clitoris. In my experience, when I touch myself during sex, men tend to react one of two ways: They either think they’re not getting me off, so they get offended or ask what they can do; or they think it’s some coded way for me to tell them that I want them to touch me, so they take matters into their own hands.