How Women Want You to Talk Dirty During Sex

About a year and a half ago, I had my first bad experience with dirty talk. I'd been seeing this guy Will* for a few months, and we were having sex. Then, all of a sudden, smack in the middle of it, he leaned down, pressed his lips against my ear, and hissed, “You like that, don’t you, you dirty little slut?”

Now, we’d both done some pretty intense dirty talk in the past. But there was something about being called a slut during sex that stopped me cold. I immediately asked Will to stop what he was doing, and we talked about what had just happened. He was apologetic, and he never used that word again in my presence.

Don’t get me wrong — I love some good dirty talk. But in the wake of the #MeToo and #TimesUp movements, I've been forced to reckon with my own history of harassment. And while I recognize that some women are turned on by hearing words like "slut" and "whore" during sex, for me, it just doesn't sit well.

How Deep Throating Exploded Into America's Bedrooms

The year 1972 will be remembered for a lot of different things. It was then that Bobby Fisher won the World Chess Championship. It’s also when the Watergate scandal broke. But let 1972 also go down as the year that forever changed our relationship with oral sex. Because that was the year Deep Throat premiered in New York City.

The film, which introduced the late Linda Lovelace to the world, and the world to hardcore pornography, follows the struggle of a woman whose clitoris happened to live in her throat. Eventually, she realizes that the only way to stimulate the misplaced pleasure point is to pivot her oral sex technique—She must learn how to open wider and go deeper than ever before. Not before long, audiences began to adopt the same style of fellatio. And that’s how the “deep throat” method trickled off screen and into bedrooms across America.

If You Want Better Sex, You Might Want to Upgrade Your Bedroom

They say you should “dress for the job you want.” The same holds true in the bedroom: If you want to have good sex, you should have a good bed. A man who knows the thread count of his sheets is a man who has his life together. That’s sexy. If you sleep on an air mattress that begins deflating as soon as you hop in, that’s not sexy. You’re going to have to do some pretty extravagant foreplay to make sure she doesn’t refer to you as “air mattress guy” forevermore.

Make sure you’re not violating any of these bed deal breakers.

Here's the Right Way to Ask Somebody Out on a Date

Real talk: Asking someone out is super nerve-wracking.

Now matter how confident you are, putting yourself out there is a big risk—because getting turned down stings. That's why you may end up avoiding asking people out altogether, or acting so nonchalant and non-committal that the person you're asking out doesn't even know if it's a date or not.

This is no way to be. We have all the information you need right here: Everything you need to know about asking someone out in a way that will leave you feeling OK, no matter the answer.

5 Tips for Beating the Holiday Blues This Season

It’s easy to think that everyone loves the holidays—tree lightings, festive gatherings, family parties, and corny White Elephant gift exchanges can be fun.

The truth? “If you sample adults, it turns out there’s a small percentage of people who love the holidays,” says John Sharp, M.D., author of The Emotional Calendar: Understanding Seasonal Influences and Milestones to Become Happier, More Fulfilled, and in Control of Your Life. “Most people find them stressful.”

We’re not saying Bah, humbug to now through January 1, it’s just that if you’re not jazzed by Christmas music, psyched to spend time with family, or—worse—feel more down in the dumps than usual, you’re not alone.

Women Aren't Having Orgasms. Men Don't Know Why. Let's Talk About It.

Sex can be romantic. Animalistic. Should be pleasurable. Egalitarian. Messy, but in a good way. Fun. Often, it’s straight-up confusing. When it comes to a guy’s climax, the routine is fairly simple: You get a little turned on, there’s some touching or rubbing or partnered stimulation of some kind, and then when you’ve reached the point of no return—a release!

But women’s orgasms can be as confounding as a Westworld plotline. First we have to feel generally comfortable around you, then remember whether or not we left our curling iron plugged in this morning, reassure ourselves that we unplugged it, then remind ourselves that we’re making out with a guy we really like. The blood eventually rushes to our genitals, and the touching from then on has to be juuuuust right—not too hard, not too soft, and usually on the exact right spot. Things are going well! We’re feeling it! And even then, sometimes when an orgasm is ascending like a firework—poof!—it turns out it was just a dud.

7 Reasons Your Nipples Hurt

We've got news for you: It’s not just women who deal with nipple pain. Men can get sensitive nipples, too, as well as bleeding, chafing, and other painful symptoms. If this ever happens to you, don’t freak out — chances are, there’s a reasonable (and totally innocuous) explanation for it. Of course, these could also be signs of a medical problem that requires a visit to the doctor.

There are several factors that can lead to nipple discomfort in men, and the good news is that it’s usually preventable and treatable. Here are some reasons you might experience tender or painful nipples, and what you can do about it.

The Most Fattening Holiday Drinks of All Time

Splurging on red cups full of cocoa while you shop and sipping festive cocktails at parties can get anyone in the holiday spirit, but drink with caution. The comforting, seasonal drinks we all love can wreak havoc on your diet and turn you into a serious Scrooge when you step on the scale.