Sex after a baby: When to bring romance back after giving birth

By Dr. Diana Sarmiento,
Nine months of carrying what seems like a watermelon in your tummy, pushing and straining to deliver your baby, getting stitches, having on-and-off bleeding, breastfeeding, sleepless nights...

The list goes on and on, making you wonder if you will ever get cozy with your husband again.

Well, the answer is YES. You will have to start having sex sometime. Even if you fear that your sutures might burst.


Here’s the timeline:

1-2 weeks after giving birth: Have your OB check your stitches

A follow-up visit with your ob-gyn is very important to get a "go" signal that all is clear for you to resume your sex life again.

The first visit is 1 to 2 weeks after delivery. The doctor will check on the stitches. Some sutures dissolve by 2 weeks, but most will be gone by 6 weeks. Bleeding may also come and go until 6 weeks.

After this visit, you CANNOT have sex with your husband. 

The stitches are not yet fully healed and you are still bleeding which can be messy in bed.
 
A second visit is warranted.


6 weeks after delivery: Sex permitted… but do so gently
 
On that second visit, which is approximately 6 weeks after delivery, a final examination will be done. 

By then, the episiotomy should be strong enough to withstand a gentle night of love-making.

How to prepare for your second honeymoon

1. Do not be afraid. As long as your doctor has tested the strength of your cut, it will not burst open during sex. 

2. Prepare a tube of lubricating gel. The same kind that your doctor uses during an internal examination. This will make the first attempt a comfortable experience.

3. Expect some bleeding afterwards. The sexual excitement may cause your uterus to contract and produce some spotting. Wash it off with a vaginal antiseptic like Gyne-Pro or Betadine.

4. You should have discussed a family planning method with your physician.Breastfeeding and bleeding are not a guarantee that you will not get pregnant. 

5. Lastly, get a babysitter, blow-dry your hair and doll yourself up. Then, go out on a date or maybe just prepare a romantic dinner at home. This will bring you back in the mood for some romance. 

Cheers!
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